I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Randomize
