only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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