Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
