I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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