The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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