The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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