Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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