This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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