boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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