He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
