Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize