Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Randomize
