you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize