It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
