So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Damn victory sex feels great
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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