my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
