I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Randomize
