Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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