THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
