is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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