its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
