Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
We just shotgunned beers for America
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
