she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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