What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
