I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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