So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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