If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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