you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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