Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
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she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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