i may or may not be watching the land before time
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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