they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just invented taco cereal.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
