My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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