Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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