great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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