if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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