So drunk its hurt
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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