you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
