At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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