ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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