I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize