lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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