We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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