all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
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