I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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