Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
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I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
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You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES