Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(714): View more from California

But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.

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(949): View more from California

Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?

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(519): View more from Ontario

oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again

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(520): View more from Arizona

I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(585): View more from New York

she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?

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(516): View more from New York

I understand why you refuse to be sober now

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..

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(318): View more from Louisiana

How did you tell her we met?

(1-318): View more from Louisiana

I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish

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