plz talk dirty to me
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one