Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
