Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal