The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
