that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
third nipple confirmed
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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