I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i dont even know how to be here
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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