No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize