yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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