love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
