I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
it's like heaven, but drunker
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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